How to find the right way of life. The life path of a person: the choice of each or fate

Instruction

List all the possible paths that are offered to you. Do this exercise in writing. The longer the list, the more options you have. Some paths are imposed on you by the people around you. Some options appear due to sudden circumstances. There are still alternatives inspired by your own principles, dreams, goals. Work on the list as carefully as possible. Do not miss even those options that you do not quite like. In the process of analysis, they can lead you to unexpected ones. So write down absolutely everything. Remember the ones that were previously in yours. Which way did they go?

Analyze each path regarding distance from your target. You must now evaluate all alternatives. Write down all the options on separate sheets of paper. Then cut these sheets into strips - so that only one option is written on each strip. Divide all the strips into 3 groups. In the 1st group there should be options that lead directly to your goal, even if you like them. In the 2nd group, place those paths that you like the most, but can lead somewhere to the side. These are the paths you prefer based on . For example, a friend or girlfriend approves of this choice. In the 3rd group, identify those options that take you too far away from your goal. There may be paths that someone imposes on you from the outside. You don’t need to neglect them, just put them in a separate group for now.

Select path, which is in harmony with your goal. Choose only one for each group. path. You must evaluate all alternatives, given that you will not be torn apart in all directions. Look at this process as if from the outside, as if making a choice for an outsider. Even in the 3rd group there may be path that traces back to your main goal.

Get away from everyone for the ultimate. Now you have 3 ways in front of you, the best ones, taking into account the interests of all parties. Justify to yourself which path closer to you. Don't worry now about what other people think. Imagine that you are the last one on earth and there is no one else, everyone has temporarily left for Mars. The fate of all mankind depends on your choice.

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note

Those close to you may insist on their version of your life. Do not be offended for them by this, treat with understanding. They only want you to live better than they did. But will you be happy doing someone else's will? - Solve this issue with your soul, so that later you do not regret the years of your life spent.

Useful advice

When you talk to loved ones about your choice, let them know that you had 3 main options. Thus, you emphasize that the choice was made consciously, after a deep analysis. At a minimum, you will be respected for considering possible alternatives.

Sources:

  • What are life choices in 2019

Dante wrote, "Follow your own path and let people say whatever they want." Each person is assigned from above his own path, which his sixth sense tells him to follow. Choose the correct path your intuition will tell you, and it's up to you to follow it or not.

Instruction

It often happens that parents and acquaintances advise one thing, but a person still acts in his own way. It would seem that the mind suggests a logical solution, but a person does what he tells him. Unfortunately, it is not always possible to clearly understand what the sixth sense suggests. There are times when intuition keeps a deep silence, and all sound thoughts have disappeared from the head. In this case, if you are standing on the path e, and the further development of the events of your life depends on your decision, then you should not rush your intention without having time to understand yourself.

Take time out and go on a trip. India will be an ideal place for your relaxation and reflection on your own. In this country, special programs and seminars are held for everyone who wants to communicate with the ancient monks. With the help of an interpreter, it will be possible to ask them for advice, to talk about a person's place in the world, his mission and tasks. You will be taught meditation, during which you will be able to understand yourself and your desires.

Right path- this is path which you like and which you like. If you are doing something and get excited about it, then you are on the right track. For example, you not only like to sing, but you are very good at it, which is proved by numerous job offers as a vocalist in local institutions. If you feel that this is yours, then you need to work even harder to achieve tremendous success. Study with a teacher, enter prestigious educational institutions. The main thing is not to stop there, and then no one can surpass you.

Choose the correct path a simple exercise will help in life. Take a piece of paper and draw for yourself the perfect picture of the future. For example, you sunbathe on the coast near your own cottage. Next to the picture, write in two columns what you can do and want to do and what you don’t like and don’t care about.

For example, you know how and love to cook, but you are horrified by the process of organizing and managing a culinary workshop. It means that you are not a manager, but a real chef. Then go not to popular entrepreneurship and management courses, but to inexpensive courses in culinary arts. Becoming the chef of an expensive restaurant, you will not only be able to “make” a fortune for yourself, but you will do what you love every day.

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The life path is an invisible trajectory, in accordance with which a chain of certain events is built, following one after another in a certain sequence. In another way it is called fate or share.

The life path of a person ... What is it? A simple set of biography facts or a subjective picture of the world, something destined or moving, changing at the will of the personality itself?

Questions that are not so easy to answer. However, one can speculate and see what opinions scientists express about this fundamental problem.

What Science Says

The problem of the life path is studied by many disciplines: psychology, history, philosophy, biology... And of course, experts in each field offer to look at this problem from a certain angle. For example, biologists talk about the importance of the so-called sensitive periods in a person's life, that is, those in which the most favorable conditions are created for the formation of certain properties and qualities of the body (for example, the period of speech development).

Sociologists note the importance of social rituals: coming of age, marriage… After all, after such events, as a rule, a person has a new set of rights and obligations, his attitude towards himself and the attitude of others change.

Now psychology defines the life path of the individual very broadly: the process of individual development from birth to death. But is it really individual? Each of us is influenced by the rules and norms accepted in society, the same social rituals that exist in any culture.

It is believed that you need to finish school, then a university, work, start a family ... Or are the biological stages of development the same for all organisms of the same species, which we also already mentioned? And then how to find your own, really your own way, if everything seems to be decided for you?

Here comes another term - "life cycle". It just includes the recurring, already defined stages of development that all people must go through - the biological and social stages. The first, for example, include birth, childhood, youth, growing up, aging ... The second - the assimilation of any social role, its performance, and then the rejection of it.

Where are we going

It is from the definition life cycle Charlotte Buhler, a researcher who proposed the concept of “personal life path”, was repelled. Unlike the life cycle, the life path includes the ability to choose from a variety of options. Considering the relationship between life cycle phases and studying biographies real people belonging to different social groups, she identified three lines that set the direction of human life.

  • Objective events that come to replace each other.
  • The way a person experiences the change of these events, his spiritual world.
  • results of human action.

In general, according to Buhler, the main force that makes a person move along the path of life is the desire for "self-fulfillment", that is, the achievement of all goals, conscious or unconscious. Buhler identified the stages of the life path, based on two factors - the age of a person and his attitude towards goals in each period of development.

  • Up to 16-20 years: before self-determination. Questions about how to find your life path do not bother a person yet.
  • Up to 25-30 years: activation of tendencies towards self-determination. A person is looking for a suitable type of activity, chooses a life partner. Goals and plans for life are still preliminary.
  • Up to 45-50 years: the culmination of self-determination. This is the time of prosperity: it is believed that it was possible to determine a professional vocation, to create a stable family. There are already results that can be compared with the intended goals. However, a crisis may also occur at this stage. A person may realize that goals have not been achieved or have been set incorrectly.
  • Up to 65-70 years: a decrease in tendencies towards self-determination. The psychology of personality is changing: from now on, a person is more turned back, to the past, and not to the possibility of new achievements.
  • From 70 years: after self-determination. A person is seized by the desire for regularity and peace. At this stage, a person can appreciate life as a whole.

As an elementary structural unit of life, Buhler singled out an event, and, as she believed, events can be objective (occurring in outside world) and subjective (in inner world personality). It's interesting that a large number of The latter, according to the researcher, indicates more active attempts to find out one's destiny, a stronger desire for self-determination.

The first Russian scientist who considered the problem of the life path, S. L. Rubinshtein, also adhered to the event approach. In his opinion, only certain turning points that set the direction of personality development in the later period of life can be attributed to events. Rubinstein insisted that the life path must be considered not only as a process of development of the organism, but also as an individual history of a particular person.

The individual contribution of a person is also emphasized by K. A. Abulkhanova-Slavskaya. The researcher does not deny that a person is limited by society and the norms prevailing in it, but at the same time, she is able, by comparing herself with others, to find her place in the world. A special view of one's own life is important - it must be considered as controlled, subject to the mind and efforts of a person.

In search of myself

Modern psychology as a whole notes several factors that affect a person's life path: a certain historical period, objective events occurring during it, social norms, actions of a person, her inner experiences, and so on.

One way or another, it’s hard not to admit that the choice of a life path largely depends on the person himself. Any periodization of the development of life is conditional, each approach is subjective.

For example, one can argue with the stage of old age in Buhler's concept. Yes, of course, this is a less active period compared to maturity, but life (especially in our age) does not stop at all after 70 years. It is the same with the earliest stage: certain individuals are known who, already in adolescence, have decided on plans for life.

This must not be forgotten when trying to find your way in life: in the end, the choice is always yours. Of course, the problem of choosing a life path after reading this text will not be solved. It will not be resolved even after a dozen such texts or more serious psychological works.

Psychology can only partly help here, but competent psychological training or specialist advice may tell you in which direction to move. In any case, you have begun the search for an answer, which means that you have stepped on a difficult, but incredibly interesting and useful path of self-improvement. And it's already great! Author: Evgeniya Bessonova

Hello,

Once upon a time there was a man who always complained about life.

And to everyone who was close to him, he showed his discontent and blamed the unfair fate.

And then one day he was walking along a path in the field. And the wise man slowly walked towards him. Having caught up, the man began to complain to the sage: “Life is so complicated… there are only problems all around… people are bad… the king doesn’t know how to lead… there is nothing good anywhere…”.

The sage raised his eyes.

There was a fence nearby. The fence was strong, but low, so behind it a cow was very clearly visible, chewing grass.

Why is the cow looking over the fence? - said the sage.

The man was surprised: - I don't know, - he answered.

Think about it. Why is the cow looking over the fence? repeated the sage. The complainant was silent.

Because nothing can be seen through the fence. - Said the sage and went on.

What does this phrase mean? What does this story have to do with finding your path in life?

We'll come back to this later. Until then, let's go to the other side.

Usually people consider it almost a feat to do something that is unusual for their nature. This is the beginning of selfishness, which says within us: You can be whoever you want in any area of ​​life ". That's what selfishness is. Selfishness means self-will.

  • More about selfishness -

"Any cook can run the state". Remember this phrase attributed to Lenin?

Each person has his own nature. In the most general case, there is the nature of a man, there is a nature of a woman. There is the nature of the leader, there is the nature of the teacher. There is the nature of the businessman, there is the nature associated with physical activity. it different nature.

And my way - it is always within the framework of the nature that I given. Mine, not someone else's.

Search within yourself

That's why first what should be understood when thinking how to find your path in life - you need to look for your path inside yourself, not outside. The outward look is the look of envy when I compare myself to other people. How successful they are... And I want to imitate them. This is how a person loses himself.

Nature is given to man from the very beginning. She may not have woken up. And so many people ask how to find your way in life. And most people, unfortunately, just do not wake up. Their nature has not been revealed.

Judging by the body - a man, but there is no male nature. The body is female, but nature is not manifested. This is just a corporeal shell, in which there is no corresponding content. Like an empty glass. It can be any externally beautiful glass, but if you want to drink, why do you need it?

When you and I are thirsty, we are not very interested in the glass. We are interested in what is in it.

A woman, a man, a leader, a teacher - different natures. You need to search within yourself. This is first.

Connection with the higher principle

Second. Nature comes from a higher source. Everyone is given a certain path in this world. Here we are all connected with the higher. Therefore, if in a person's life there is no experience of openness to higher leadership, trust in him, it will be very difficult for him to find his way in life and find himself. If there is no connection.

In the most general case, it will be difficult for a person who is far from spiritual practice to understand who I really am and what I should do.

  • Read

So, the first thing is to look within yourself. The second is to seek in these higher relationships. It is in this connection that nature manifests itself.

➨ First. Try different types activities. 'Cause when we try, explore different areas, we begin to feel where is closer, where is ours.

➨ Second. If a person is not in harmony with himself, his emotions… If he does not know how to feel and understand his needs, then it will be difficult for him to find himself. Even if he will do everything that was written before.

Convoluted psychological scenarios distort the ability to recognize something. To understand yourself, you need to work out some of your emotional blocks-problems.

➨ Third. Communicate with other people and consult with them. Because sometimes it is easier for another person to understand us than it is for us to understand ourselves.

Now let's remember the story of the wise man and the cow.

In fact, just above, we have already revealed its meaning. Noticed?

If a person always pays attention only to problems ...

If he keeps discussing why everything is the way it is and not otherwise...

If he rests his eyes on the thick fence of his (albeit imposed, but accepted as his own) negative beliefs ...

Such a person is unlikely to understand how to find his way in life.

Remember the example of the consciousness of the fly and the bee? The fly picks at the negative and lives in it all its life. Tastes everything that is bad, and is attached to it. And when there are only problems around, tell me, is there really time to think about really important things? Once - you need to suffer. More about the consciousness of a fly and the consciousness of a bee -.

How to avoid difficulties along the way

The cow knows exactly how to find her way in life. And you?)

Eastern treatises say that most people do not learn anything. They suffer all their lives, doing the same wrong things and getting reactions for it.

Few people think about why certain events come into their lives. Thinking about it, some people gain some experience and gradually change their lives. This is called "learning from your mistakes".

But there are other people as well. True, there are very few of them. They are always learning. Because they accept life as a loving leader whose guidance is unerring. Thanks to this, they avoid many problematic situations and move extremely quickly along the path of personal growth.

There is a lesson to be learned from everything. Think about what this or that situation teaches me. This is the real answer to the question of how to find your way in life. When everything that happens around, it is better to accept your teachers. Even the cow, which as if by accident looks over the fence.

How do you feel about it?

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According to the lectures of Ruzov V.O. and Gadetsky O.G.

You won't find your destination if you look for it!

A lot of books, psychological tests, horoscopes and divination try to tell us what our destiny is. I myself have been fascinated by all this nonsense for a long time 🙁 But faith in fate and destiny is a delusion. There is no record of the chain of events that you have to live anywhere. There is also no record anywhere of what you will work for or what business you will open, or how many children you will have and who will be your life partner.

Everything develops out of its own Primordial nature. This is the non-doing of the Tao. It gives us a virtuous nature and gives us the opportunity to live it ourselves and realize it in the form that we choose. Thus, we are given a common direction - Unity with Tao and virtue, thanks to our Primordial nature. There are five basic principles of life (Unity, Non-action, Harmony, Cultivation of Yang and Devastation of Yin) and our characteristics, which I think are the result of our past lives.

All we can do is embody our nature step by step with our actions, developing and cultivating our features, getting rid of delusions and obscurations. But we can do this in many ways! The main thing is that they correspond to our nature and do not give rise to internal or external conflicts.

In this way, fate is not a chain of predetermined events, but the form, the potential of which is inherent in our nature. Our life force gradually nurtures and inflates our form (talents and features) as Balloon ik. And we begin to shine around like a Chinese lantern, with our own special color and pattern.

It is useless to ask others what our purpose is and what we want 🙂 Since it is inside us. It is useless to know this in advance, because being at the stage of an acorn, we cannot imagine what kind of oak we will become and what we will want. To find out, we will have to grow year after year, deciding which branches to grow and how to arrange them. Life will make its own adjustments and at the end of life, we will be able to say what was its meaning 🙂

It is useless to try to know who we will be, also because the meaning of life is not how big and strong an oak tree we will become, but how much we will give everything that we have! How many people will we give shade on a hot sunny day, how many animals and insects will we shelter, how many will we feed on acorns, how will we influence the spread of the forest around, how much new soil will be formed from our leaves, how much oxygen will we produce ...

If by the end of your life you give everything you could to the world, then you have realized your nature and fulfilled your destiny. And the highest form of self-realization is when a person gives himself to the Universe, completely merging with the Tao and renouncing the ego.

Stop looking for yourself, fixing your image with a specific description, shackling yourself in the shackles of goals and plans! Stop imitating others, following other people's stereotyped advice and trying to squeeze yourself into the framework of any profession. By acting in this way, you most often run after gain and selfish desires, while self-realization and your Path expect generosity and goodness from you.

Start walking where your heart goes… where sincere interest and play (experiment) is born. Start right now to give the world around you what is in your nature. By displaying your virtuous qualities, you will begin to feel what it is worth trying to do next. Stop looking around and comparing your life with other people! It is a huge relief to stop chasing some standards of a successful life and finally return to yourself ...

Stop fighting and achieve what is difficult

To follow your own Path and not get carried away decoys and desires, you need to imitate water. Water always flows in the lowlands, flowing down from the highlands, and uses the force of gravity. In this way, water does not strain or exhaust itself, it is always modest and does not try to climb the surrounding hills, uses the force of the universe (gravity) and does not fight with anything.

When the wind blows, ripples appear on the water, when winter comes, the water becomes covered with ice, when the sun warms, the water evaporates, turning into clouds. She always follows external changes and does not try to avoid her fate, does not ignore her nature. Her Path is always simple and serene.

Water does not choose its Path according to its selfish desire - it fills the void that occurs on its Path, and chooses the most easily passable places, thus applying a minimum amount of effort. Water does not fight with anything and occupies the space that no one needs, otherwise this space would not be empty. That is, she does not try to take possession of something that belongs to someone else, and takes only what is consistent with her nature.

At the same time, water brings life to all living things, and thus it fully realizes its potential, its Primordial nature, following the principle of Harmony, Non-action and Unity. She does not force anyone to drink and does not refuse anyone, this is the highest virtue.

To get into the narrow cracks and continue on the Path, water is soft, that is, it is not selfish and does not cling to any principles, plans and goals. When water falls into a valley between mountains, it does not try to break through a stone with its pressure! She calmly waits for the whole valley to flood and she rises to the level where she can continue her Path between the mountains to the next gorge or valley. If there is not enough rain and groundwater to fill the entire valley, the water does not show discontent that it cannot flow further, but humbly living his fate, becoming a beautiful mountain lake.

When I worked at my first job, I knew several programming languages. And thinking about changing jobs, I posted a resume for a PHP programmer, a Java programmer, a web designer and, it seems, even a game designer. Of course, I wanted to work where I would be interested (creating sites in PHP or designing computer games), but still the main thing for me was to earn money for a living, for renting an apartment and for the implementation of my projects.

Earning money for food and housing, as well as for creative self-realization is quite natural. If you do not set yourself limits and strict criteria. Therefore, when numerous offers for Java began to come to me, and there was a sluggish response to the rest of the resumes, I easily went to the vacancy of a Java programmer, although I knew the Java language the worst and did not particularly like it. This was my Path, since Life gave me many vacancies for a Java programmer and I was hired with almost no experience and no knowledge of English language. That is, there was no resistance from external circumstances to me going to Java, there was a void into which I could take a step without much effort.

For 2 next year I read at least a hundred books about programming, learned English, changed 3 jobs and my income increased 20 times. I could not even dream of such dizzying changes! And at the same time, for two years, I had to learn a lot, do things that I had never done before, and change. Thank God I didn't follow my ego and go to some game development company. Jobs for game designers were few and I would be stuck in such a job without the opportunity to improve my situation. Not to mention the fact that I would not have ended up in the Zhen Dao school then and would not have got acquainted with Taoist practices.

Everything that I did in those 2 years was not my desires or goals, but rather the urgent need of the current moment. And I tried to act in the most easy way for myself, since the intensity of the changes was too great to be distracted by something superfluous.

If you feel stress, something is hard for you, you often fail or are completely at an impasse in life - this means that it's time for you to throw out the excess from your life. You cling to something and do not spend all your strength on the fight, instead of looking around and finding your Way. You need to discard goals that don't fit with your nature or the current moment, or you need to change the way you achieve them so that it is consistent with your talents and characteristics.

If you do not have motivation for something, you do not need to force yourself and motivate! Relax, give yourself a break. If there is no desire to act, then the form of actions or their direction must be changed.

Humility allows you to see new possibilities. Give up envy of someone else's life, stop chasing success, return to yourself and your current position. Start acting without fighting external circumstances and you will see the voids that are on your Path. You will recognize them by the fact that they allow you to move forward where your heart takes you, and at the same time do not require super-effort.

Naturalness instead of plans and templates

Most often, people rely on their plans and goals, which they build based on their selfish desires. The problem with this is that this is how we try to fix the future and build it with all our might, instead of just following the current moment.

Right now we are faced with some tasks that need to be addressed. Stop flying into your pink dreams or act out of fear, running away from change. Look around here and now, as if you were a child again and went out into the yard for a walk: “What is interesting here, where can I go, what would be so fun to do?”

For example, I once wanted to create my own strategic computer game about space. And for that, I read books about programming and game design. I had a task in front of me that was interesting to me. It was natural for me, since since childhood I did not like to sit and do nothing, I always liked to invent, design and invent something. It's part of my nature 🙂

Therefore, when I read difficult books and articles about programming or game development, I did not have the feeling that I was doing something difficult and overcoming any obstacles. I did not have a goal to create a game by such and such a date. It was easy for me (even despite the fact that I didn’t understand everything and didn’t succeed at everything), because I played!

At work, the Internet was prohibited for us (state enterprise) and I used an expensive Mobile Internet to read articles about programming. Pictures had to be turned off to reduce traffic and pay less money. And these expenses of money, even despite the fact that I had a meager wage, were a joy to me - after all, I spent them on the game. I never created my cosmic strategy, but I did not regret anything, because I did not try for the sake of the goal ... I was pleased with the Path itself.

So when you imagine yourself in water and think about what next step to take, this step always leads to where there will be no resistance for you, where you have a sincere interest, a game. And there will be no resistance, because what this step will require from you corresponds to your talents and current capabilities! And for another person or observer from the outside, it may seem terribly difficult and unpleasant. That is why, when you take such a step, you do not meet resistance, since no one of the people will want to go there and compete with you, because they have a different set of talents!

If a person is on his Path, then he will meet resistance not from outside, not from circumstances, but from his ego. If the situation calls for the rejection of any beliefs, requires modesty, flexibility, politeness, discipline (refusal of the superfluous), then our ego may begin to fight. Difficulties on the Path cleanse us of everything superfluous, but if we follow false goals and selfish desires, then we continue to accumulate obscurations and delusions, struggling with external circumstances and overworking ourselves with deeds that are not suitable for us.

Following your Path, you strive for the benefit of others, like water, which brings life to all living things, and by this you restore Harmony. And following selfish goals, you strive for profit, accumulate harm and thereby destroy Harmony!

If you are tired of what you are doing and find yourself thinking that you are continuing because of some ideas about right life- Throw it away! If you are still interested in the general direction, then change the form of your actions. Take away what hurts you and add more games and joy. Learn to use your talents and shortcomings without neglecting anything.

I'm tired of programming and I no longer work as a programmer. But since I have this skill, I am a blogger who not only writes about Taoist practices, but also can add features to my site that others do not have. In addition, I can structure information, build classifications and hierarchies, presenting information about Taoist practices in a way that no one has ever presented it before. I also suffer from excessive attention to detail, perfectionism is a form of pride. But I also use it to improve my articles and videos. In this way, I use my set of unique skills and weaknesses to move into those gaps that are empty and that only I can fill, using and realizing my potential to the fullest. This is my Path... because in the whole world only I can go through it 🙂

And this Path requires more and more flexibility from me, I realize my potential more and more, rejecting “not my own”: imposed goals, desires, rules and ideas from books, someone else’s experience and recipes for success. I don't know where my next step will take me until I take it. I don't try to fix my desires, saying, "I'm going to that valley" and if I don't get there, I will feel unhappy or disappointed. When I get into a valley and don't know how and where to go next, I just wait until I fill it to the brim (study and try it) and the next step will open before me. I don't try to break rocks or climb a mountain just because it looks beautiful and alluring to me from below.

Being in the lowland (showing modesty and humility), we allow Life to direct the rivers of opportunities to us. We get everything we need without any effort. Achieving something with great difficulty, we show violence against ourselves and the world around us. If we met external resistance, then we are trying to occupy a space that is not empty for us and our talents, which leads to a waste of energy in the fight against circumstances and contributes to the accumulation of delusions that we can remake the world according to our selfish plan.

When we follow our Path, any work is pleasant and psychologically easy, and any result will not bring disappointment. It's like when I was a kid I made a steam engine out of blocks and foil. The pressure in the boiler was low and she did not go. When I was making a balloon, it caught fire and did not take off. But in both cases, I was not disappointed with the result, since the game itself (the creative process) was interesting and important to me. To enjoy life, you must be grateful for what you have. And in order to be grateful for what you have, you need to discard selfish desires and choose your own Path, and not the achievement of goals. Then your life will interesting game, and not the race for the result!

Always act on the potential of the situation

All things and phenomena are born in Non-Being, where the Primordial nature is rooted. At the moment of inception, everything has subtle characteristics that are easy to direct in the right direction, easy to change or dissolve. Acting at this stage - we will make the most of our current opportunities, whatever they may be!

Our selfish desires make us struggle with what has already manifested itself, as we want to get what we want here and now. It also makes us strive for profit and fortune, which is contrary to the Law of Harmony. The fact is that when we achieve maximum benefit, good luck and happiness, we inevitably encounter the Universal mechanism, which restores the balance of Yin and Yang (Harmony) and brings the situation to the middle. And this means that we lose part of the results achieved, we begin to struggle with this process, we suffer and we can lose everything.

Taoist masters try to avoid failure, and thus achieve good fortune. They grow the good and remove the harm, and so they get the benefit. In other words, they affect the potential of the situation!

Lao Tzu gives an example: if you want to catch a bird, plant a tree. In doing so, we benefit the world, as another tree appears in it. Birds themselves fly to the tree to build nests and eat its fruits or catch insects on it. And we catch them easily. As a result, we cultivate Unity, as we do something useful for the world. Use Non-Action as we don't have a bird at first and the potential of the situation is that a bird will fly to where we are. We plant a tree and by doing so, we cultivate the hidden potential of the situation in which the birds themselves fly to us. In doing so, we rely on the natural mechanisms of nature, using the power of the instincts of birds that live on trees. We also restore Harmony by cultivating good (Yang) and removing harm (Yin): first we give housing, food and the opportunity to multiply, and then we take it.

A selfish man takes a gun and goes into the woods to shoot birds. He brainstorms, coming up with cunning plans to capture them, such as a whistle that makes sounds like ducks and attracts drakes. Thus, he harms the world, but does not give any benefit, violating Harmony. He exhausts his strength in running through the forests, feels dissatisfaction if he does not shoot anything, harming his health. And most importantly, he violates the Unity, separating himself from the world and not realizing that harming the world, he harms himself, as he is a part of this very world. By doing so and achieving success, he perpetuates his selfish delusions and emotional obscurations of the heart, and becomes blind in such situations.

This example is somewhat out of date, as we are no longer dependent on hunting and our lives have changed a lot since the days of Lao Tzu. But you can apply this example to your work when you start to demand something from colleagues, suppliers or clients. Instead of doing something so that people themselves do what you want, like birds that fly to a tree of their own accord, we most often use violence and cunning to get them to do what we want and benefit us.

And all because it seems to us that the struggle and direct impact on the current moment, the most fast way get what we want. We just don't realize the harm we are cultivating in this way. And he, accumulating, either does not allow us to achieve what we want, or later destroys everything that we have achieved.

The benefit itself accumulates where the benefit is actively manifested. In the same place where benefit is actively accumulating, harm is accumulating along with it. Therefore, if you want to get something, you should remove the harm that has not yet been manifested and cultivate the benefit while it is small. And if you want to get rid of something, you should let it grow, then it will begin to fade on its own. And while it grows, you can shape the new that will come to replace it.

For example, getting rid of bad habit, you should not fight it, but it is worth cultivating a new good habit. For example, instead of fighting smoking, start practicing Taoist practices 🙂 Smoking, having reached the limit, will disappear on its own ... and will be replaced by meditation or Qigong exercises.

And if you want to achieve material well-being, start doing something useful for those from whom you expect this well-being 🙂 It is only important that it be useful, not profitable! Benefit and benefit are completely different concepts. Benefit appears where there is emptiness, and benefit appears where something accumulates.

Influencing the potential of the situation, you will always achieve success, since the natural changes of Yin and Yang will always help you, and not oppose. Like those birds that fly towards you, of their own accord.

Give all you have and take all that is given

Being born, we are like an acorn, which gradually turns into a mighty oak. Someone had to grow in an open field, with fertile soil, water and sun. And someone will have to grow on a bare rock, clinging to cracks with roots and being content with occasional rains. And although our Primordial nature is the same for us, the circumstances and talents are different. And we can give ourselves to the world in different ways.

If you are destined to grow on a rock, you will be a thick, dry, gnarled oak in places. And looking at your fellows in the fields, you may selfishly want to live like them, repeating after them, listening to their advice, dreaming their dreams. In doing so, you will change your nature and deviate from your Path. Such people do not appreciate what they have, and over time they even stop noticing, since all their attention is focused on how others live.

But if you think about it, the most beautiful pictures depict those trees that are not symmetrical, have flaws and stand out in some way, catch our eye! Start getting rid of envy, of the desire to quickly achieve someone else's success, following their patterns. They built their lives on their own terms and opportunities, and you have your own Path.

And even if it still seems to you that a small gnarled tree on a rock has nothing to give to the world, still continue to grow your potential. Over time, when you learn to extract water from narrow cracks, learn to withstand a powerful mountain wind, learn not to lose yourself in the morning mist, appreciate every moment when the sun shines, you will have something to tell others and something to give to them.

You will bring to the world your special benefit and Harmony, which no one else has and cannot have. And the world will share with you those gifts that are only in the gray inhospitable mountains!


They say about finding a calling: “Just follow your heart!” And hearing this is not always pleasant. Of course, I would follow my calling - if only I knew what it consisted of.

Questions about their purpose are most often asked by those who work long, hard and hard. When they know what they are doing, nothing can stop them. The problem is that sometimes you can choose the wrong start. If you feel like this, let me offer you some new ways to find your way in life and feel like you belong.

Choose the right perspective.

Consider an example. You come to a restaurant convinced that you cannot choose anything good for yourself here. “I'm not hungry,” you tell yourself. “And there is absolutely nothing to eat here. I don't even want to be here." Naturally, with such an approach, the restaurant menu is unlikely to seem attractive. The same principle applies to finding a calling. If you are convinced that it will not be easy to find it, or that it will never happen at all, then you will remain closed to many possibilities. You will unconsciously block all the signals that it sends the world. After all, how can you find your life's work if you do not believe that it exists in principle?

Learn for yourself the installation that finding your favorite thing is real. The easiest way to do this is to surround yourself with live examples. Let those people who follow their calling be next to you. If there are few of these among friends and relatives, make new acquaintances with those people who will inspire you.

Take a mini test to find your calling.

  • What can I talk about without getting tired?
  • Who do I admire and why?
  • What do I always like to learn about?
  • What would I like to accomplish in my life?
  • What difficulties and problems am I best able to solve?

Follow your desires.

The expressions “find your way in life” and “follow your heart” have long passed into the category of rhetoric. Instead of thinking about an exciting career or a huge project, focus on small but real steps. Ask yourself: what can inspire me right now? Then do it, and follow your next desire, and then the next, and so on. Have fun like little kids do.

Because they are always in the present moment. They are fully present in the "here and now", playing in the sandbox. Having played enough, they immediately move on to another activity that interests them. They are always in harmony with what they are doing. That is why you should reconsider your relationship with your " inner child". Do what you like and see what happens in the end.

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Pay attention to what annoys you or makes you jealous.

Take a closer look at those people who make you resentful. Perhaps behind this irritation there is actually a desire to live the same life as they do?


Expand your "comfort zone".

If you want to find your way, it's time to try new things. They may seem intimidating, but otherwise it will be difficult to find a calling. Challenge yourself. Growth and development never happen in limited conditions when a person makes the same route every day from home to work and back. Try new things, take up a hobby you've been dreaming of for a long time, take risky steps.

Look at the concept of a life path more broadly.

Many people understand a vocation as the one and only occupation that makes a person happy. However, for all its depth, this definition can be limiting. Having been doing the same thing for decades, a person is able not to even suspect that his mission lies in a completely different area - and perhaps not in one.

If you spend precious time your life to a task that is not fulfilling, this can lead to boredom, frustration or depression. However, life is an exciting journey, not a trip from one point to another. And this route can always be changed at your discretion. When you find out what your calling is, then life becomes harmonious and fruitful. By finding your own path, you can also significantly change your career and increase your level of well-being.